From Hyperfocus to Chaos: Learning to Work With Your Neurodivergent Brain
On discovering that "different" doesn't mean "broken"—and how ancient practices can heal modern brains
Yoga brought me a sense of softening into myself; Spinal Energetics brought me complete nervous system healing and spiritual integration.
Part of this healing journey included uncovering my “neurodiverse” brain, (which helped to explained a lot of things) — as I’ve come to embraced an approach of radical self-acceptance.
As I was recording this week's Finding Harmony Podcast with therapist Raquel Devillé—who specializes in neurodiversity and trauma recovery—I found myself nodding along to every description of ADHD traits, every mention of sensory overload, every insight about masking and the exhaustion that comes with trying to fit into neurotypical expectations.
Walking into my kitchen afterward, I laughed out loud. Every single cabinet door and drawer was hanging open from my morning coffee ritual—a perfect metaphor for my ADHD tendencies that provoke me to start projects everywhere, then leave the room - only to circle back hours or days later to close the loop.
For years, I thought this was a character flaw. Now I understand it's just how my brain works. And there's a profound difference between those two perspectives.
The Masking Marathon
Growing up, I learned to hide my differences with the skill of a master performer. In ballet, my hyperfocus was celebrated as dedication and discipline. I could spend six hours straight perfecting a sequence, completely absorbed, forgetting to eat or drink. Teachers praised my "commitment" and "work ethic."
What they didn't see was the internal struggle—how starting most tasks would feel overwhelming because I knew I'd get completely consumed by them. How transitions between activities often felt jarring and disorienting. How being forced to stop before I felt "complete" left me frustrated beyond belief.
In school, I developed elaborate systems to compensate for how easily my mind would get distracted during reading and comprehension challenges. While other students could skim through material quickly, I needed twice as long to process information because if it wasn’t something I was interested in my brain would get distracted, drifting off to think about more fascinating things. Then I’d have to go back and read it all over again. But I was academically successful, so no one—including me—recognized the signs of neurodivergence.
Later, in yoga communities, my ability to practice asana for several hours or meditate for long periods was seen as spiritual advancement. The same hyperfocus that made me feel different everywhere else was suddenly a gift in spiritual circles.
But the other traits—my need for flexible schedules, my resistance to rigid routines, my desire to move or fidget during long lectures—as a way to stay focused—those were still seen as problems to overcome.
This selective celebration of neurodivergent traits is common in wellness spaces.
We praise the monk-like focus and discipline, while pathologizing the creative chaos.
We celebrate the ability to follow the “daily morning routine” while judging the need for stimulation and novelty.
The Hidden Cost of High-Functioning
Many women with ADHD become experts at masking because our symptoms often present differently than the hyperactive stereotype.
We're the daydreamers, the people-pleasers, the ones who appear to have it all together on the surface while our internal world feels like a constant chaos.
I spent decades perfecting the art of appearing calm, centred, organized, while behind the scenes, it often felt more like a tornado. Since then, I’ve developed systems to help plan my day, so I’m not derailed by an unexpected phone call or email that could send me down a rabbit hole for hours, only to come out the other end exhausted with no energy left to focus my mind on the more important things.
As an adult running multiple businesses—teaching yoga, coaching private clients, offering online and in-person Spinal Energetics treatments, hosting podcasts, creating courses, planning international travel for workshops and retreats, all while balancing the needs of my extended family and teenage son—I was diagnosed with ADHD in my early 40’s. Something that was discovered while working with a Functional Medical Doctor for Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) and Hashimoto’s thyroiditis (an auto-immune disorder) which was resulting in symptoms of anxiety and depression.
Suddenly, so much made sense.
I started digging into this new diagnoisis and discovered that hormonal changes during perimenopause, menopause, pregnancy, or menstrual cycles often exacerbate ADHD symptoms, causing struggles with memory, organization, and focus to emerge more strongly in one's 40s or 50s. On top of that, behavioral changes tied to life transitions—career growth, parenting, or even empty-nest syndrome—can bring previously hidden coping mechanism to the surface, where it becomes more obvious that some deeper pattern is underpinning certain behaviours.
When Opposite Brains Collide…
Living with my husband Russell has been a fascinating study in neurodivergent compatibility. Where I thrive in flexible chaos, he needs everything in its exact place. Where I resist schedules because they make my brain feel trapped, he finds security in precise routines and timings.
In many ways, we are the exact opposite. I’ve learned to train myself to schedule at least 20 minutes prior to the time I actually need to leave the house just to be on time getting out the door, and even then, I’ll still be rushing or late. Whereas, he has no problem walking out the door at exactly the minute he intends to. His need for order sometimes feels rigid to me; but my flexibility feels like chaos to him.
Understanding our different neurotypes has transformed our dynamic. We've learned to work with each of our strengths, making allowances for our different needs, rather than criticising or making the other wrong.
Raquel shared something beautiful in our podcast conversation: "Being neurodiverse doesn't mean being broken—it means being human." This reframe feels like freedom.
» To continue in this exploration… 👉 Listen to this eye-opening exploration of neurodivergence and healing (and discover why "different" doesn't mean "broken") 🎧
Alternatively, you can subscribe and watch all our episodes on YouTube 👇
The Spiritual Paradox
Here's what I find fascinating about neurodiversity in spiritual communities: We often celebrate traits that come naturally to one type of neurodivergent brain while simultaneously judging other brains for their challenges.
But what I've discovered through my own nervous system healing journey is that practices like yoga, pranayama, Spinal Energetics, and TRE (Tension & Trauma Releasing Exercises) can create profound integration for challenging tendencies.
These aren't band-aid solutions or ways to "fix" ourselves. They're tools that help our nervous systems find greater regulation, which naturally supports our brains in functioning more smoothly.
Five Signs You Might Be Neurodiverse
If any of this resonates with you, here are five common signs that you might be experiencing a greater degree of neurodiversity than others:
1. Time Blindness: You consistently underestimate how long tasks will take, frequently run late, or get so absorbed in activities that hours pass without notice.
2. Hyperfocus vs. Scattered Attention: You can either focus intensely for hours or can't concentrate at all—there's rarely an in-between state.
3. Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria: You experience intense emotional reactions to perceived criticism or rejection, often feeling criticism more deeply than others.
4. Sensory Processing Differences: Certain textures, sounds, lights, or environments feel overwhelming, while others feel soothing or necessary for regulation.
5. Executive Function Challenges: You struggle with organization, planning, or completing tasks in logical sequences, even though you're intelligent and capable.
If you recognize yourself in these patterns, know that you're not broken.
Your brain simply processes information differently, and with the right tools and understanding, these differences can become strengths.
Ancient Practices for Modern Brains
What gives me hope—both personally and for the clients I work with—is how profoundly healing nervous system regulation can be for neurodiversity.
Spinal Energetics, in particular, works with the body's natural wisdom to release and reorganize patterns that no longer serve us. It's not about forcing ourselves into neurotypical boxes… It’s about finding greater ease within our own unique wiring.
We learned in this conversation that TRE helps discharge the chronic tension that often builds up from years of masking and trying to fit in. The spontaneous tremoring that Raquel described isn't just stress relief—it's a return to our body's natural capacity for self-regulation.
Pranayama is another powerful practice that offers a direct pathway to nervous system regulation. It works directly with the autonomic nervous systems and shifts brainwaves into alpha states where focus becomes effortless rather than forced.
Three Practices to Support Neurodiversity
1. Nervous System Reset with Spinal Energetics — Allow your body to discharge built-up tension through gentle energy work or natural tremoring. These practices help reorganize your nervous system without forcing anything to change, creating space for your natural rhythms to emerge.
» Click here book a session with me online «
2. Pranayama for Regulation — Practice simple breathwork like (4 counts in, 4 hold, 8 counts out) to drop your brainwaves into alpha states.
» Download this FREE guided audio practice here «
This creates the optimal brain state for both focus and creativity while regulating your nervous system.
3. Environmental Design — Create spaces that support your specific needs rather than fighting against them. If you need movement to think, create a walking workspace or schedule breaks to go outside. If you need large blocks of uninterrupted time to help you stay focused, keep them scheduled without shame. Work with your brain, not against it.
This is the work I do with clients through creating a personalized coaching program. If you’re ready for support » Find out what working together would look like here «
The Revolution of Self-Acceptance
Understanding my neurodiverse type hasn't "cured" anything—it's done something far more valuable. It's allowed me to stop making myself wrong for being exactly who I am.
My hyperfocus is both my superpower and my challenge.
My need for growth and expansion drives my creativity and sometimes my overwhelm.
My non-linear brain creates innovative connections and occasionally makes simple tasks feel impossible.
All of this is true. All of this is human. All of this is workable when we approach it with compassion rather than judgment.
As Raquel said in our conversation, "I don't know if neurodivergent is a thing—but I know we're all different."
Maybe the goal isn't to fit into narrow definitions of normal, but to create a world spacious enough for all our big beautiful, chaotic, hyperfocused, obsessive, scattered, brilliant human brains.
The practices that have helped me most aren't about changing who I am—they're about creating the nervous system stability that allows me to be fully myself without apology.
And perhaps that's the deepest healing of all: Not the elimination of our differences, but the radical acceptance of them.
This reflection emerged from my conversation with therapist Raquel Devillé on the Finding Harmony Podcast, where we explored the complexities of neurodivergence, masking, and the healing potential of somatic practices. Listen to our full conversation to dive deeper into how understanding your unique brain can transform your relationship with yourself.
If you recognize yourself in these patterns and want to explore nervous system healing, I invite you to experience how Spinal Energetics can support your journey toward greater integration and self-acceptance.